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Hello blog friends and clickety-clickers! Are you well today? Me? Well, I have been better and I have been worse. The 'worse' has brought out a thought I can't let go of just yet.
Is blogging voyeurism?
Before I started this blog, I had read only one blog that I was introduced to through a magazine. I didn't see anything wrong with reading this blog as long as what was written on the blog could also be written on a postcard or published in a paper or magazine. And now, almost 5 months on, I still feel the same way about blogs. But I have found that there are blogs I choose not to read because of the high personal content that I don't feel like I should be privvy to although the author has chosen to put it out there. I exercise choice- the free will that God gave me.
Why is this still bugging me? Well, remember the perished friendship I wrote about at Easter? He told me that he thought I didn't like him and his wife because I hadn't made personal contact with them in a few weeks. They never asked me what was wrong, and plainly assumed I had a problem with them which I didn't, hence my utter shock. And besides I am a very open person, I would have told them everything that's going on if they had asked.
He emailed me saying that he has looked at my blog and concluded that I was having a social life without them- sorry, didn't know that they were into crocheting granny squares, knitting and cooking for my family because that is what I blog about, no? He then went to on to say that he was sorry he read my blog because that reduced him to voyeurism. He told me when I started this blog that blogging is voyeurism and he and his wife do not subscribe to it. Was I offended? No! Everyone is welcome to their own opinion. But I was offended that he chose to read my blog instead of talking to me as that is not a healthy way to conduct a friendship. Perhaps that was voyeuristic? What do you think?
This is the third post out of 70 odd that I have written something deeply personal. I just want to know what your thoughts are on blogging- Why do you blog? I see bloggers who aspire to be published authors, who promote their online business, who are staying in touch with family and friends from across the world and who simply like to connect with others who enjoy similar hobbies. Many are a combination of the above. I have come across bloggers who I feel share a lot of personal stuff, but I don't read them. I don't read blogs that don't interest me or offend me or that make me feel uncomfortable. Perhaps you have already stopped reading this post and have clicked on to something else. No one makes us read blogs.
Along the way, I have learnt a bit about blogging etiquette, much was already common sense. Should I be commenting on every blog I read? I do when I have something to say, but sometimes I don't have something to say back to the author- is that bad? Is commenting on a post like signing a visitor's book? More people visit my blog than comment- I know because I look at my stats- it doesn't bother me . . . does it bother you?
Tell me what you think. I want to be a considerate blogger and I think perhaps I need some scope from you!
Thank you...
xxx
I only blog about what I am happy for both my best friends or my worst enemies to read. I assume that it will be read by teachers, family, neighbours and that way I try not to offend with the level of detail I go into.
ReplyDeleteAs for comments, I love them. But like you I know that many visit quietly and I don't take offence. I consider it the same as passing strangers on a walk. Many will walk by silently, a few will look up and say Hi. Those that do make me smile back, some may even in time become friends.
Fi, blogging for me was about connecting with other like minded individuals and being able to share the things I love. Like Gina I only reveal personal things that I am happy for anyone to read.
ReplyDeleteI read blogs for a couple of years before leaving my first comment so understand that not everyone feels comfortable commenting but I do love to receive them too as it affirms that I am posting about what interests others.
I think people that don't blog don't understand the community spirit of bloggers and find it hard to understand the friendships that are developed through the blogging community....each to their own but I think it's unfair to persecute you for having a life outside of your real life friends...your blog is just an extension of the wonderful person you are, but doesn't define you :)
xx
Hi Fiona All good questions. I posted about why I blog here at http://www.lifeonplanetbaby.com/2010/11/why-do-i-blog.html and still adhere to what I said. I'm delighted you're blogging, you gorgeous girl! J x
ReplyDeleteHi, I'm new here, I have been blogging for YEARS and I can remember feeling like this.
ReplyDeleteFirstly I had to look up what voyeurism meant...I had no freaking idea!! So I may not be the sharpest tool on the shelf.
I began blogging as a side to my home based business. The business closed down because I couldn't balance all the balls in the air and they fell crashing down onto everything in sight. get my drift.
I have continued to blog because I love the creativity of it, the thought that goes into photos, words and posts. It gives me one thing in my life that is not revolved around kids, wife or house duties. I live in a bush setting without the company of people every day and it keeps me social and engaged in society.
It has helped me overcome isolation, depression and low self esteem. It has been vital in my recovery of PND because it inspires me to create weekly and to see the smaller things.
I am one of those people that posts personal things, about my sobriety, having a child with a disability and I even wrote once about how my boozies are heading south. But it is nothing that I am uncomfortable talking about.
You will find your own comfort, you will know when you have over stepped the mark and you will delete some posts. We all have and we all do.
For the most part, I have enjoyed blogging and for the 643 posts that I have done, I have never had a negative comment.
I wish you good luck on your blogging adventure. I hope you choose not to listen to people who don't understand and continue on.
xx
I've been thinking about this since I read it yesterday. I'm still relatively new to the whole blogging thing and still feel a bit strange when people comment at school about something I've written! I've been amazed that anyone is interested at all to be honest!
ReplyDeleteI love reading about other people's experiences just like I love chatting to people 'in real life', so I guess I shouldn't be too surprised.
I tend to take the same approach as in life that you shouldn't say anything you would be ashamed of your Granny/Mother/kids/Boss reading!
Hope your week has been better
Sxx
Heyya Fi!
ReplyDeleteOh sweetheart! That sucks...
You blog about what you want to blog about.
I blog about some personal stuff (i'm probably one of the ones you don't read huh? huh?! Joke!) but I'd like to think I'm the mixture you talk about.
I don't like to comment on peoples blogs after they've commented on mine (I know I'm doing that now BUT unintentionally!). It feels fake to do that and alot of people do it! And I don't like to comment on peoples blogs just to get followers!
Put your blinkers on and do what suits you.
And FYI, my mother-in-law reads my blog and she LOVES it, personal stuff and all :: it's me! It's MY blog. I don't think I'm rude, inconsiderate or offensive in my blog but I'm honest.
You're so so gorgeous and I'd give 2 of my other friends to be yours! Hehe! (Joke - but ssshhh, I would!!)
xx Stace