When Liam was born, he had a small patch of red squiggles on his right cheek. They looked like faint broken capillaries and were almost invisible on his jaundiced little face. The only thing we were told at the hospital was "it will get worse before it gets better". They didn't even tell me what it was! It took a lovely doctor at my church to tell me it was an haemangioma (blood lump/benign tumor/strawberry mark). And it did get worse!
I used to never really notice it getting worse, or rather didn't want to as all I wanted to do was to love and nurture him. But I was always reminded of it in public. Really stupid people would come up to me and blatantly ask me what was wrong with him! What's that on his face? Did you burn him?
The crazy thing is, no one wanted to actually listen to my answer. It's like their eyes and tongues were disconnected from their brains and they just blurted out their shock of his appearance like an uncontrollable verbal fart. In my head I would scream don't ask if you don't want to know! I did tell more than one person to mind their own business and what's that on YOUR face?
And then there were the double-takers and the starers. Some people, I've discovered are extremely underdeveloped socially. I would come home and have a little cry. Not out of embarrassment or shame of his face, but from fear that this silly red splotch on his face could one day tell him he was a freak or worthless because that is how some adults were viewing him. Even at my church a few people recoiled in disgust at him!
Not everyone though. There are some people in our lives who have always seen his beautiful eyes, smile and funny personality.
I started doing some research on haemangiomas and was overwhelmed. I went to a plastic surgeon at Sydney's Westmead Hospital who told me that there was nothing you can do and it may go after 20 years! This is after he stuck his unwashed, tobacco stinking fingers in Liam's mouth! It took me months before I went to a private surgeon for advice. Months that were critical and therefore meant I missed the boat with one of the treatments available.
Then I just gave it over to God. All of it. And I believe He told me to wait. Wait and see. And you know what, it began to involute quite quickly. The redness and bulkiness have all but gone. We are still facing the possibility of surgery but I also believe God may have another plan yet.
This is the same little man who suffers random seizures and yesterday I was told he has significant hearing loss in his left ear. I am praying for God's direction and trust Him to guide me as Liam is not only my son, he is His son too.